Wednesday, July 5, 2017

It's Here! My Mandatory Cat Post- Meoooow!

Mandatory Cat Post
A while ago, I was reading a interesting post Dissecting the blogosphere, at the When Your Only Tool is a Hammer blog. It describes different types of blogs and bloggers. I found myself fitting into description of most of them. Maybe this is due to me being diagnosed as having what was known as Mutliple Personality Disorder (MPD) and today is termed Dissociative Identity Disorder ( DID).

Since I am Dr DoLittle today, and have 2 cats, Kiki and Barnie, they have told me that it was time for THEIR post. After discussing the merits of : Owner Worship, Tuna, and the Feather Dancer Toy, the topic selected was: Ways Cats Are the Better Than Those Idiot Dogs.

Sooooooooooooooooooooooo! Here it is…

Ways Cats Are Better Than Those Idiot Dogs

Good Helpers- Lap up any split milk or tuna juice. Way better than a Roomba Vacuuming Robot for finding those dust balls.
Tanning Coaches-They find the best patches of sun for daily naps, even on a cloudy day.
Expert LookOuts- Always on duty at the window watching for the dreaded Naperville bunnies from hell and any feathered critters. If a stranger is coming to the door, they quickly warn you by running away. Just follow the vapor trail to see where they came from.
Bed Warmers- They pick the best spot on my DH’s pillow and warm it up for him. Is it Not their fault that it is 90 outside and the ceiling fans are going. Beds always Need to be warmed, that is what they live for!
Lap Dancers- Ok, another name for the lap dance is kneading. They jump into your lap and knead you before settling down for serious petting sessions.
Teachers of a Foreign Language- When us humans, see a kitty, we instantly speak another language “Awwwl, what a cutesy, wootsy little mee mee baby”.
Yoga Guru - Are you that flexible to touch your tongue all the way down to your butt? Cats are and do.
Team Work - While Barnie jumps into your lap as you sit in front of the computer, Kiki goes under the monitor stand and in back to stick her paws thru the keyboard shelf and slaps at your fingers. They enjoy the shrieks, especially late at night, when it seems a paw is coming out of no where.
- They are experts in change. “Let’s knock over monitor, flower vase, or just anything to change the look of the room.”
Relaxation Experts- They realize that there is no such thing as a bad time for a NAP.
Bad Karma Ridders- Having a bad day, just pet a purring cat to get rid of the bad karma. It really works!
Best Friend- They are non critical of your old tattered bedrobe, unshaved legs (they really like those) and soft out of shape body. If a cat loves you, than you ARE good looking and intelligent.
Masters of Manipulation- Let’s face it, cats win your heart and then enslave you.

1 comment:

Mary*Ann said...

Debbie, love cat enslaved by 3 of them :-)